Doctor to the patient: "You are very sick"
Patient: "Can I get a second opinion?"
Doctor: "Yes, you are very ugly too…"
**
Health news…
Can smoking increase my risk of Alzheimer's disease?
A new study has revealed that those who smoked experienced accelerated decline in brain function. They scored lower in planning, organizing and other mental tasks. Smokers were forgetful.. and likely to have difficulty remembering common words.
**
Tongue in cheek "Latest" news on tv…
"Economists predict that personal income will increase by 25% per year when the new 15-month calendar is approved…"
**
Weird world…
Chinese man sells fresh air in a can…
A Chinese man is selling fresh air in a can. Chen Guangbio, whose fortune is said to be Pounds sterling 470 million, has turned to drastic action to combat the harmful smog in the country, and even sells several flavours of air ranging from pristine Tibet to post industrial Taiwan.
(Me: A wonderful biz opportunity as more n more ppl are concerned about their environmental pollution!)
**
Driver held on drug charge after pocket-dialing 911
New York: A conversation with two passengers landed an Orange City, Fla., tow truck driver in jail after his cell phone pocket-dialed 911 and dispatchers listened in.
**
Important health news…
Marriage reduces heart attack risk: study…
Married people are less prone to heart attacks than those who are single and more likely to recover from a stroke. The study claims married people have better health habits, and enjoy higher levels of social support than the unmarried, which promote their overall health.
(Me: Spot-on! The discerning people already knew this truth. The myriad jokes about the woes of married men and henpecked husbands are just that – jokes – composed in the fertile, misogynous minds of men themselves!! More, men are all skirtchasers and seem to get wiser about the perils of being married only after they get married…)
**
Health tips…
Feeling tired after waking up? 10 minutes in the morning sun can increase your energy levels and keep you fresh through the day..
**
Cast iron or stainless steel pots and pans are better than Teflon coated pans which emit toxic fumes at high temperatures.
**
Newspaper headline:
BAN THE BAN
A reference to the banning of the Haasan's viswaroopam.
(Me: One should take all these kinds of punned or other comments from our media with a pinch of salt. The mediawallas want to eat the cake and have it, too, and every controversy blown skyhigh boosts eyeballs and circulation. If the movie was released and there were law n order problems, the same media would go hammer n tongs at the government for not foreseeing things to come.)
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TOI headline:
BUST JOBS BOOM
(On an article about the booming business of breast-enhancement cosmetic surgeries in the country).
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"The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives" – Mark Twain.
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And a parting shot for the day…
A Scots boy came home from school and told his mother he had been given a part in the school play.
"Wonderful," says the mother, "What part is it?"
The boy says "I play the part of the Scottish husband!"
The mother scowls and says: "Go back and tell your teacher you want a speaking part."
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