Saturday 3 January 2015

[www.keralites.net] 10 Most Common Regrets in Life

 


 

The life we live is the legacy we leave behind. Everyday counts for something, and every relationship has meaning. No one wants to live in mediocrity, with their dreams and aspirations deteriorating behind the façade of a day to day rat race. At the end of life, many people express regrets, wishing for a second chance to get it right. In reality, there is no second chance; we have to get it right the first time. These are the top ten regrets most likely to change the course of someone's life.

1. Never Resolving a Conflict

The number one regret a person can have is not resolving a conflict. Countless funerals are full of regretful friends and family that never got the chance to right a wrong. Bitterness can sour a lifetime of memories, wedging itself in between relationships and people that love each other. Don't let anger last a lifetime.
 

2. Not Spending Enough Family Time

For many people sending their kids off to college, or watching them get married can conjure thoughts of times growing up as a young family. Often work can come in the way of family time, resulting in distance between husbands, wives and children. Inserting a family day into a weekly schedule and making time for family vacations each year can prevent a person from having such a strong regret.
 

3. Not Landing a Dream Job

Going to college for years and getting a degree leads a person to begin seeking work in the field of their dreams. However, often employers are not hiring in limited fields, leaving post grads to find work in other occupations. What starts out as temporary can become permanent, with salaries and benefits luring employees into a lifelong commitment to a single company. While the money may be great, a job can feel like a rut if it isn't the job you longed for.
 

4. Not Saving Enough Money

For many people in their twenties or thirties, retirement seems like a distant future, not an impending reality. They may choose to defer retirement savings into other purchases for immediate gratification. This can turn into a disaster during the golden years, when money can often be tight. This is an easy regret to avoid by setting up automated investments into an IRA throughout the working years.
 

5. Not Having Children

Children are often viewed as distractions or inconveniences, getting in the way of careers and personal goals. Though it may seem like a good idea to not have kids, the choice can leave a person very lonely as they begin to age. It is a natural human desire to wish to leave a heritage with descendents, so be careful in choosing to put off having children.
 

6. Never Taking up a Sport or Hobby

Countless little boys spend their youth community sports, dreaming of one day playing for a professional league. Though not everyone has what it takes to be a professional, there are other ways to incorporate a passion for sports or other hobbies such as learning to play an instrument, or taking on a second language.
 

7. Never Telling Someone You Love Them

There is nothing like going to the grave, remembering "the one that got away." Sometimes it can be hard to express true feelings for someone if the outcome could mean rejection. However, holding it all inside will leave heart aching for closure. It is better to share your heart with a loved one, rather than miss out on a chance at happiness.
 

8. Never Traveling

Growing up, most people dream of visiting an exotic island, backpacking through Europe, experiencing the Great Wall of China, or finding love in the city of Paris. Travel is a healthy ambition that creates memories to last a lifetime. Failing to travel to a dream destination can leave a lifetime of regrets. Don't let financial circumstances or life events keep you from visiting the places that you love.
 

9. Never Getting a Degree

A small percentage of people successfully graduate high school, go to college, and acquire the degree that they set out for. Life circumstances can get in the way, with some students quitting college to get married, have children or go to work, never returning to school. For people who take pride in education and intelligence, having a degree is proof of their capabilities and accomplishment. It is never too late to go back to school and get the degree you always wanted.
 

10. Never Buying the dream home

Everyone has an idea of the perfect home in the perfect location. Maybe it's a luxurious Manhattan apartment full of chic and modern furnishings. Or perhaps it's a three story beach house overlooking the Pacific with a mountainous backdrop and scenic views. Settling for a suburban track home may be less than the expectations of an average American. One of the biggest regrets a person can have is not raising a family in the dream location they once desired.

 

http://www.connectingsingles.com/top-10-list-33-top10-most-common-regrets-in-life.htm

 

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Posted by: Junaid Tahir <mjunaidtahir@gmail.com>
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[www.keralites.net] 6 Ways to be Wise

 

Knowledge is knowing the tomato is a fruit, wisdom is not putting it in your fruit salad." – Miles Kington.
Wisdom has a close relationship with sight-related words: foresight, insight, hindsight, reflection, enlightenment, visionary, etc. The wise person is able to see beyond the small issues and find a larger perspective; that is why they are so fascinating and useful. Telling your problems to a wise person will result in a solution that you might have not been able to think of, because you are too concerned with your own problems (which, in the scheme of things, are small).

 
Really, isn't wisdom why we are all here? If wisdom is looking beyond individual things and seeing larger trends, then people on this website can see that their life is made up of all the little habits and traits that make them so individual. Crafting a better life is all about focusing on those small things and hacking them to create a larger effect further on in time.
Here are six uses of this skill of looking beyond the near and the obvious. They all have this one thing in common, but have wide and far reaching effects.

1-  See Beyond the Cloud of Emotions

Beginning with Aristotle and Plato, philosophers have argued that emotions interact with reason when we make decisions. Aristotle believed that emotions exist on difference scales, and having an extreme on either side of the scale is a failing. For example, the virtue of courage is the perfect middle ground between the extreme emotions of foolhardiness and cowardice. The way to make this balance, in Aristotle's view, is by the use of reason. Or, to use a cartoon example, the Green Lantern has to use power rings of different colors (emotions) occasionally to overcome his enemies. Only when these emotions are channeled through the power of his green ring (representing willpower) can Hal Jordan save the day.

2-  Seek Long-Term Goals instead of Short-Term Pleasures

The infamous marshmallow test suggests that being able to delay gratification is a cornerstone trait of successful people. But, more than that, it is linked to better physical health, psychological health and social standing. The connection is obvious: it is far easier to sit down and watch TV or eat, rather than going for a walk, having a heart-to-heart with a loved one, or making new friends. It is easy to forget what you want in the long-term when you don't have clear goals—that is why having them is such an indicator of success.

3-  Dispel the Illusion of Certainty

Life is certain? Are you sure about that? Every living creature tends towards homeostasis: it attempts to stabilise its environment for security, stability and simplicity. The tendency of chance is to create insecurity, instability and complexity, but it is only through chance that living things can evolve. Evolution isn't just limited to biology—it happens with culture and innovation as well. The wrong chance adaptions can cause an organism to die out (unsuccessful mutation) and this can be true of other evolution. The chance development of fire mutated and changed the race that discovered it; the chance development of nuclear power and rockets did the same, but they may be our end.

With chance, there are no limits to change because there are no restrictions of logic, purpose or morality. Understanding the nature of the dice can shatter comfortable realities, but it can also stop people from living an illusion.

4-  See the Consequences of Your Actions

Just like throwing a rock into a lake, your actions create ripples. When you fail to understand the consequences of your actions, there are two resulting problems: if the consequence was negative, you will fail to learn from your mistake and keep on repeating the problem behavior; if the consequence was positive, you will be unable to repeat the behaviour that gave you your desired results. Either way, you lose out. When you assess different courses of action, understanding the potential consequences is what allows you to repeatedly make the best decision. Remember the carpenter's proverb; "measure twice, cut once".

5-  Understand the Holistic Nature of Knowledge and Community

Learning in one area can improve learning in others. This isn't touched upon much in schools, although some people capitalise upon it and produce great work in their exams. The classic example is that learning a musical instrument can make you better at mathematics. Our brains aren't good at dividing what we know into subject areas—people just try to force them to do so.
The same can be said of communities: we live in societies that are dependent upon others, and part of accepting that is offering the acceptance we would give to a neighbor across the street to the people of a neighboring country. Cosmopolitanism is the ideology that all humans belong to a single community based on shared respect and morality.

6-  See Things as They Are

Many of us have our vision obscured by the information presented to us. Media capitalises on sensational and gruesome stories, with little attention paid to the mundane, which makes it easy for us to become disenchanted with the world. When we see current events, there is wisdom in looking into the context and the history behind those events, as well as looking forward to the possible future outcomes. In the history and context lie stories and motivations that are ignored just to give a story a certain spin or to make an argument appear stronger.
The truly wise man understands how far the scope of knowledge extends and how little they know in comparison. Because of this, a wise man would never try to list comprehensively all the ways to become wise, so these are a just a chosen few. Feel free to add to them, in your own time.

 
in improvement, ListPost - on 12/27/2012 10:17:00 AM - No comments

 

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Posted by: Junaid Tahir <mjunaidtahir@gmail.com>
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[www.keralites.net] Statistics: How far we've come

 

Statistics: How far we've come 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


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Posted by: Murli dhar Gupta <mdguptabpl@gmail.com>
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