"25 Things Women Want To Hear"
1. Gee Sweetheart, let's skip dinner tonight.
The only thing I'm hungry for is you.
2. Wow, I just don't know what to do with
this money we won in the lottery, so why
don't you take it to the mall and see if you
can find something to buy with it.
3. Hey, how about inviting your mother to
spend the summer with us.
4. Oh, go ahead and eat that third piece of
chocolate cream pie. If it's one thing I hate
it's skinny women.
5. What luck, they had a special rental rate
at the video store on romance movies.
6. How about I give you a nice massage and
foot rub. I really don't like sex that much anyway.
(Huh?? - ^v^)
7. You know, that Pam Anderson just doesn't
seem to have the brain power that I find so
attractive in a woman.
8. What a break, I won a prize on the radio
station.... tickets to either the super bowl or
the opening of the New York Ballet. I got first
choice so pack your bags for New York, we
get to go to the ballet!!!
9. Be careful Darling...don't let it go too far
down your throat.
10. Who wants to play golf when I can get
to see how good the lawn looks when it's
freshly mowed.
11. While your up Sweetheart, can you get
me a glass of water. I think I've had enough
beer.
12. Shoot, there's nothing on TV but football
games. Let's go furniture shopping.
13. There ought to be a law against those
porno movies. Can you believe that there are
guys that would actually want their wives to
do those things
they show?
14. Man I tell you, nothing feels better than
getting all spruced up in a suit and tie.
15. I'm getting a little tired of steak on the
grill. How about a nice quiche?
16. You know, I think I'd really prefer the
four-door sedan to that impractical Corvette.
17. Look at that... disgusting. Why would
she wear a short skirt like that with no panties?
18. Golly I think we're lost. Let me find a gas
station to ask for directions.
19. My golf clubs are only 30 years old. Why
don't you use the money my parents gave us
to get something nice for the house.
20. If the guys call and want me to go to that
new strip club with them, tell them I'm busy. I
really want to get the living room painted tonight.
21. You know Sweetheart, I'm really glad you
don't like doing all those dirty things they write
about in those stupid sex advice columns.
22. Sports cars are just such stupid little toys
for men who have never really grown up.
23. If you're looking for me later, I'll be over
there looking at the home decorating magazines.
24. You know, we really don't visit your relatives
enough.
25. Why don't you relax this weekend. I'll take
care of the cooking and housework.
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