One of my most affectionate moments with my Dad occurred, when I left home to work in Saudi Arabia in 1977, he hugged me and kissed on my forehead, that meant so much to me. I continue to dwell in that moment. In the Indian society in the 50's and 60's affection was not expressed verbally, but the affection was part of every moment of the life.
Once I refused to go to Ramadan Eid prayers as I was loosing interest in religion and becoming an Atheist, I was about 15 years old then. My father did not get angry or threw a fit over that, instead, he sat down and had a conversation with me – and offered me choices – that I lived in the society and to survive and live a fuller life, I have to get along with them and have a working relationship. I was expecting a boring lecture or anger – I got neither instead I was moved by his wisdom.
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M. Abdul Rahman |
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Everett A. Blauvelt |
He never hit me except once – I was sitting at the porch of my house relaxing, and watched a man fell off from his bicycle with a big bag of rice. He was struggling to get back on it, and I was laughing… at a distance I saw my father coming… and then he sped, that sent a chill in my bones, had never seen him in that mode… I ran inside the home, he helped that guy and followed me. I hid on the heap of Paddy bags in the corner of my house. He went out and pulled the branch of a mulberry tree and bam – he got me and said something to this effect, "my son will not sit and do nothing when someone needs help. He got me brainwashed pretty well to stop and lend a hand to anyone in need."
My father is my hero. He opened the windows of wisdom to me and led his life as an example. He was one of the most open minded persons I have known; he had prejudice towards none, indeed, if I pass that test and I am getting closer, I would like to have my head stone read "zero prejudice". Thank you Dad!
Then I owe my gratitude to Dadski Everett Blauvelt. Since my father passed away in 1977, Dadski has been a great father figure to me, he always inquired about my family all his life and was very caring and helped me through the death of my father. He was instrumental in getting me here in the United States and he passed away on April 21, of this year.
The way I have learned to appreciate these men is by taking time. I will do my early morning prayers of gratitude for these two men.
I am blessed to have so many great friends who are fatherly figures to me; Sri. D D Maini; Rev. Bill Mathews; Dr. Harbans Lal; and Dr. Qureshi. Happy father's day to ya'll.
I feel the pain of those who did not have a good father, or had an abusive father or did not even know a thing about him. I am proud of you for making it in life despite not having a father, and respect and understand your pain and struggles. I pray for the well being of all those how feel sad today, that is the least we can do in a cohesive society. If any one of you considers me a fatherly figure, please feel free to call and talk to me for a few minutes.
Mike Ghouse
www.MikeGhouse.net
(214) 325-1916
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