Monday 6 May 2013

[www.keralites.net] Khatte-mitten khabhrain from around the world for 6/5/13

 

 
Railway Minister's nephew held for promising Officer a top job for Rs.10 crore bribes.
 
(Me: The government railway job, however top rung it may be in, may not fetch a salary of over Rs.50 lakhs per annum - or one-twentieth of the bribe the officer was prepared to pay, in other words it may take him no less than 20 years to earn it by way of salary, not considering of tax deduction at source. What it means is, the officer was confident of raking in at least 100 crores in bribes during the period.)
 
**
 
Tongue very much in cheek…
 
"News is to the mind what sugar is to the body" – Rolf Dobeli, the Swiss writer most for famous for not consuming news because, he believes, it is toxic.
 
(Me: the discerning would readily concur with his views, for news is all bakwas; I for one seldom watch TV news..)
 
**
 
Tweet of the century!
 
M.J. Akbar (the well-known columnist) : "India a joke in Maldives, a foe in Sri Lanka, a doubt in Bangladesh, a shrug in Nepal, a snigger in Pakistan, a taunt in China"
 
(Me: hahahahaahaahahaahahaha.. A true laff riot tweet)
 
**
 
Tongue very, very, very much in cheek…
 
Work is a necessary evil to be avoided!
 
**
 
From the world of science…
 
Boost memory with three glasses of champagne…
 
Connoisseurs have long advocated its benefits – and now a new British study has suggested that three glasses of bubbly a week can help improve memory. According to the study a regular tipple of champagne can help prevent brain disorders such as dementia and Alzheimer's.
 
(Me: uncork the champagne bottles in celebration of this discovery!)
**
 
Beat your stress with paper and pen…
 
London: A study has suggested writing a 'happy list' before the start of each working day can help stressed-out workers improve their problem-solving skills.
 
(Me: Not just for stress, even for severe depression, a happy frame of mind is the best antidote.)
 
Eating apples daily helps lower cholesterol levels.
 
**
 
Since paneer (a byproduct of milk) is rich in calcium, eating it helps development of bones.
 
**
 
What causes eye floaters?
 
As we age, the clear jelly-like vitreous fluid that fills the inside of the eyeball thickens or shrinks, forming clumps that cast a show on the retina. The nerve layer on the back of the eye that allows you to see floaters take different forms: dots, circles, lines, clouds or cobwebs.
 
**
 
Obese man to wife: "Chocolate is made from cocoa beans and beans are a vegetable, so eating a candy bar is almost like having a salad"
 
**
 
Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands. When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset, "You're running around with other women," she charged.
 
"You're being unreasonable," Adam responded. "You're the only woman on earth."The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Even. "What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
 
"Counting your ribs," said Eve.
 
(Me: To the uninitiated of the Christian legend.. Adam has one rib short because God took it and turned into a full grown woman..)
 
**
 
A man called his friend's house and a small voice greeted him.
 
"Is your Daddy there, can I speak to him," he asked.
 
"He's busy," the little voice replied.
 
"Well then, give the phone to your mother or brother."
 
"Nope, they are both busy too."
 
"For goodness sake, what are they so busy doing?"
 
"They are looking for me!"
 
**
 
Quote of the day….
 
"I'm a pilot. Evaluating the impact of India's labour laws on job creation, I'm tempted to say: May Day, May Day, May Day" – Baijayant Jay Panda, BJP MP, on the country's labour laws.
 
(Me: Contrary to the myth we Indians love to perpetuate, not MNCs are willing to set up shop here to the very tough exit laws; getting the myriad permissions from umpteen government departments paying bribes at every level is a gargantuan task by itself, the exit laws that allow companies to close their business due to severe market conditions or constant labour troubles are a lot worse and frighten the daylight out of prospective businessmen who want to invest in India)

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