Tuesday, 16 October 2012

[www.keralites.net] LOVE MAY BE BLIND BUT YOU AREN'T


In Shakespeares Mid-Summer Nights Dream we learnt Lovelooks not with the eyes, but with the mind, and therefore is winged Cupid paintedblind. We have read more often than not thatLove is blind. If you love someone it is more often than not tough to see the obvious or make an impartial assessment of the persons character. It has been witnessed so often that love clouds your judgment and you are not able to see beyond a cloak of all that is glossy and beautiful.

What does she see in him? He is so full of faults, She could do so much better! Oh well I guess Love is truly blind!havent we all said this at some point of time or the other? But why is it that when one is in love all that they see and consider are the good qualities of the person and simply choose to ignore those that may, at a point in time in the future, be the cause of that love breaking down? Think about it, are you too blinded by love?

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Robert Brault famously noted that It is not that love is blind. It is that love sees with a painters eye, finding the essence that renders all else background. The feeling of being in love is all too overwhelming to even warrant the need to focus on what makes up the person in entirety. The bad, the horrible and the irritating are adjectives that one avoids associating with a loved one. But dont you think this is something which often results in heart breaks and distress?

A wife tolerates every nuisance of her husband on the pretext oflove. She often ignores the signs of impending doom on their relationship as she is all too busy being enveloped in this false feeling of ethereal love. A boyfriend fails to see the temperamental difference between him and his girlfriend; he does things against his will and interest for that day in his imminent future where she will transform magically for him. Isnt he blinded by the rosy notion of love? Of course he is and his castle of love is just floating in the air waiting for a tornado to shatter it to pieces.

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What happens when you walk in a highway with no street lights at nightblindfolded? There is a hundred percent chance of you being run over; almost to certainty. Being unsighted in love is no different unless of course you are a favourite of The Man up there!

Look into your relationship and ask yourself the question, Am I blindly in love? When apersonforgoes his individuality, his likes and dislikes for a person he is in love with then it is nothing but walking down a roadblindfolded. It may be a plain straight forward path for a while but he is bound to trip as soon as the bend appears. Love is a beautiful feeling no doubt but everything needs to be in perspective; more so in the times we live today.

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If you falling in love compromising all that you believe in then trust me it may not actually be worth it unless the compromise is from both sides. You cry and make up your mind to end it then and there if you are a girl. Thats it you think and no longer want to go through the pain. But then suddenly the phone rings and flashes his name. You pick up the call and amazingly disregard all that you just decided. Why does that happen? He calls you in his own sweet time not when you urged him repeatedly. That simple and hugely delayed call from him melts you and you are prepared to put everything behind you. If that is the cycle of yourrelationshipthen you need to ponder if this is actually conducive for your well being.

I have often seen people going through miserable periods of courtesy theirpartners but they readily forgive and move forward all the while pretending that all is well. But is it really? If you cannot erase the memories that hurt you, if on occasions you frequent that part of your recollection which harbors negativity towards the bond then certainly the issues still persist deep down. The first thing you need to keep in mind is that a relationship needs respect as much as it needs love. Apersonwho cannot treat you well or simply realize what hurts you isnt really the ideal partner.

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It is good to accept a person with the good and the bad while entering into arelationshipbut it is suicidal to ignore what is unpleasant. When you decide to be with a person it is advisable to weigh the pros and cons. Whereas it is always a good thing to give second and third chances to people, ask yourself if you are being taken for granted because of that. Ask yourself if you need to hide or swallow your true feelings to ensure the smooth weather in yourpartnership. If yes then it certainly isnt all that hunky dory!

Often there have been instances that a person loses all self belief and confidence while in a relationship. While there is always a weaker and a strongerpersonin a bond however it certainly doesnt mean the weaker one is not entitled to feel good or put forth his points. A rapport between two adults seeing each other can only work if together they form a balance without causing one to become too submissive. Endurance in a relationship is a duty of both, not just one. You must remember that being in a relationship is very different from being in an abusive one. Dont get soblinded in love that you fail to see the impending doom.

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Thinking about the unpleasant incidents may be hurtful but living through it is equally agonizing. One must ask the question: Is tolerating the abuse worthy of a few moments of love? Sometimes one gets so engrossed in the idea of love and that perfect person that itdoesn'teven dawn on them to what extent they are caught up in a turbulent phase oflife.

Do you cry more than you laugh since you have been with him? Have you transformed into somebody you fail to recognize since the inception of this association? If the answers to these questions are in affirmative then please stop and take a good look at where you are going and why. Remember, your friends and family will always be there when you need them. There are people who satiate their egos by hurting theirpartners. You certainly do not need them in yourlife.

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They say that falling in love is to lose yourself into the other person. But how can that be right? Should you be allowed to be yourself too when you are giving that liberty to your partner? Ask yourself some hard hitting questions; dont take up a lifetime of pain for a few moments of delight.

True Love is said to be blissful. It transforms yourlifefor the better and makes you more comfortable in your skin. So if your relationship makes you feel anything apart from that, contemplate if its time for you to remove that blindfold.

Are you stillblindin love?


Aano bhadrakrtavo yantuvishwatah.(-RIG VEDA)
"Let noble thoughtscome to mefrom all directions"



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