Question: How many days in a week? Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday Question: When is a retiree's bedtime? Answer: Two hours after he falls asleep on the couch. Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb? Answer: Only one, but it might take all day. Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing
without worrying about getting caught at it
Gene Perret Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees? Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done. Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors? Answer: The term comes with a 10% discount. Question: Among retirees, what is considered formal attire? Question: Why do retirees count pennies? Answer: They are the only ones who have the time. 'There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit...retire!'
Groucho Marx What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire? Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage? Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there. Question: What do retirees call a long lunch? I have never liked working.
To me a job is an invasion of privacy
Danny McGorty
Question: What is the best way to describe retirement? Answer: The never ending Coffee Break. Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree? Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents. Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with? Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth. Question: What do you do all week? Answer: Monday through Friday, nothing; Saturday Sunday, I rest. I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work.
So I do it three or four times a day.
Gene Perret | 
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