Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
**
Tongue in cheek…
Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiency talented fool.
**
Mind chow
Never reach out your hand unless you're willing to extend an arm..
**
News of the day…
Salman to be charged with culpable homicide..
The Bandra court has decided that Salman Khan should be charged with culpable homicide not amounting to murder in the American Express Bakery hit-and-run case. IN SEPTEMBER 2002, a car driven by the actor had run over a group of people sleeping on the pavement near his house, killing one and injuring four. Recently, top cop-turned-activist YP Singh alleged that the cops investigating the case were helping Salman delay the trial by not producing the relevant witnesses in court.
(To those Indians who have been clamouring that India should bring back Headley – who has been convicted for a 35-year imprisonment by a US court – for trial in India for enhanced punishment, the Salman case is a prime example of how serious court cases involving the high n mighty get delayed in our country).
**
The Rajni saar filmi modus operandi…
Fake CBI officer was inspired by Rajni flick…
Sudhir Khadse posed as CBI officer and extorted money from government officials; he even stole jewellery worth Rs.1.75 lakhs.
He got the idea of impersonating officials from CBI, Anti-Corruption Bureau and Income Tax after watching a movie by the Tamil superstar, Rajnikant, according to the local cops.
(Me: Rajni may have "En vazhi, Thani vazhi", but criminals employ them with gusto!)
**
Food for thought…
Husband throws darts at his wife's photo, and not a single dart hits the target.
Wife calls out from the kitchen, "Honey, what are you doing?"
Husband: "Missing you!"
**
'Juvenile' Justice Board indeed. Please use common sense and not put this monster back on the streets, irrespective of whether he is 17 or 18. – Gaurav Kapur, TV presenter. (Note the single quotation mark, plz…)
(Me: But some wags say, common sense is the uncommonest thing in India!)
**
Think it over…
"A hero is someone who understands the responsibility that comes with his freedom" – Bob Dylan.
(Me: Why only hero? It applies to every single citizen!).
"Never spend your money before you have earned it" – Thomas Jefferson.
(Me: If everyone does pay heed to Jefferson's sagely exhortation, all the banks in the world would go bust sooner than later, for their very sustenance comes from the that you and I shell out through our noses!. Anyways, another adage worth remembering is a dollar/rupee saved is a dollar/rupee earned..).
**
"When a juvenile rapes, it's certainly not a minor lapse." – Bachi Karkaria in TOI.
**
Tongue in cheek…
"The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources" – Albert Eistein.
(Me: Piracy/plagiarism without getting caught with your pants down is the name of the game!)
**
This is only a joke (like the myriad Santa-Banta ones..), so laff it off, plz..
A barber gave a priest a haircut one day. When the priest tried to pay for it, the barber refused saying, "You do God's work." The next day, the barber found a dozen Bibles at his shop door.
A policeman came to the barber for a haircut, and again the barber refused to accept money. "You protect the public," he said. The next morning, the barber found a dozen doughnuts at his doorstep.
A lawyer came to the barber for a haircut, and again the barber refused payment, saying, "You serve justice." The next morning, the barber found 12 lawyers standing in the line, waiting for haircuts.
**
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