Tuesday, 22 March 2016

[www.keralites.net] OUR FUTURE LEADERS

 

Our future leaders...

Why Teachers DRINK

The following questions were set in last year';s GED examination . These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)

Q. Name the four seasons
A.. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q. How is dew formed ? 
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on ?
A.. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed.

Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections ? 
A.. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.

Q. What are steroids ?
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs .. 
(Shoot yourself now, there is little hope)

Q... What happens to your body as you age ?
A.. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty ?
A.. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. 
(So true)

Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A.. Premature death.

Q. What is artificial insemination ?
A... When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.

Q. How can you delay milk turning sour ?
A.. Keep it in the cow.

(Simple, but brilliant)

Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorised (e.g. The abdomen) ?
A.. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O,U

Q. What is the fibula ?
A.. A small lie.

Q. What does ';varicose'; mean ?
A.. Nearby.

Q. What is the most common form of birth control ?
A.. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.


Q. Give the meaning of the term ';Caesarean section';
A.. The caesarean section is a district in Rome .

Q. What is a seizure ?
A.. A Roman Emperor. 
(Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit)

Q. What is a terminal illness ?
A. When you are sick at the airport. 
( Irrefutable)

Q. What does the word '; benign'; mean ?
A.. Benign is what you will be after you be eight . 
(brilliant) .

Q. What is a turbine ?
A.. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head. Once an Arab boy reaches puberty, he removes his diaper and wraps it around his head.

 

 

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net

Dr. Jatin Soni

M. D. Hegde
MANGALORE
Think Good Do Good

whatsapp
number 90355 30833
https://www.facebook.com/groups/hegdemd
www.federationits.com


www.keralites.net

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