Holy Humour His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means? "Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?" It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'" (This one is my favorite.) to her brother in another part of the country. and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, its morning." and couldn't find a space with a meter. "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Lead us not into temptation." "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets." The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage Caution: Do not step in exhaust." "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?" "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy. Finally the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip." It's the same in my business." and the center of attention. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in "But, you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances." the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. ======== When he sees that you are living what you read, he flees..... I just defeated him!
A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!"
The son replied, "I do know!"
"That's easy, Daddy..." the young boy replied excitedly,
=======
There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible
"Is there anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk.
"Only the Ten Commandments." answered the lady.
========
"Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world.
========
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time
Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read:
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note
========
There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation:
========
While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage.
========
A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question,
A hand shot up in the air.
"Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked.
"You know - Our Father, who does art in Heaven... "
========
A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend.
"Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay.
The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean.
========
People want the front of the bus, the back of the church,
========
Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about.
The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt."
Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the pastor stopped by for tea
He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming."
========
The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation
"Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently.
During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty;
At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star Spangled Banner."
When you carry the Bible, Satan gets a headache.....
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Posted by: kanagasundaram wignarajah <wgnrjh@yahoo.ca>
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